Creating stuff

I write this with no point of writing, which means that unlike previous writing, I don't have any specific kind of topic that I want to talk about. I just want to write. The thing is, I believe that me writing doesn't have to be on a specific topic per say . It's enough to just create some content. I for one had consume so much things, from food to writings by other people.

The writing of something is I guess, some sort of therapy for me. A therapy to reflect back on what I've done today. Now it's 2 AM. I can't say if i've been productive today. I wake up 6 AM to pray and after that, I just played with my phone. Scrolling twitter to see some news. Make some hot milo to drink while being outside, while listening to Jordan Peterson podcast with Joe Rogan.

And after, I took a shower. And I proceed with reading a journal that I've been curious to read since yesterday which is the saving glut of the rich. I won't be writing about the journal that i've read. Maybe some other times. To say the least, it was a difficult reading for me to the point that I've fall asleep while reading it. In front of the laptop.

I close my laptop and decided to take a short nap. Spoiler alert, it wasn't a short nap. What I imagined to be short 60 minutes nap became a 6 hour of sleep. Yeah i did not expect that.

I woke up being in weak state. Maybe because I played badminton last night. Anyway, I was so weak that I want to resume sleeping but I know, if i continue my sleeping. I will wake up having a painful headache.

In the late evening, I decided to take my brother to a walk at the beach near my home. I say it's a kind of a good idea to bring my brother to a walk. I want him to exercise. Guess I'll do the same thing tomorrow. Walking does provide a clarity of mind that I so needed with the bombardment of information that i'm facing daily. which is my choice by the way.

Washing up after the evening, i just laid on my bed. That was soo boring man. It was so boring to the point I fell asleep. And here we are now waking up in the middle of the night because I couldn't sleep.

I proceed my night eating while listening to Jordan Peterson. I gotta say, It's not my first time listening to him but today it hit very hard. I mean the topics that he talked about are so relevant now. Maybe because I felt like shit today which I guess contributes to the feeling that i felt today.

I don't know man, this idle time that I have is really killing me. It will be another 2 months before i'll go back to the university. Can't wait. Don't get me wrong, it isn't because i dislike being at home with my family that i love so much. They're my life you know. It's just that when the time comes, where you've reached my age, you just have to get out from the comfort zone in your house to face the ever challenging world outside. My university campus is i like to categorized as the outside world.

In the pursue of the knowledge, which I doing now because I'm a student. You cannot sit or be in an environment that too comfortable. If I'm in an ever comfortable environment, i'll be so lazy man. Like I have difficulties to finish one book and read some other books because I'm so distracted with other stuff such as my phone and my laptop.

I have to be in an uncomfortable environment to nurture my will and spirit to learn, acquire knowledge. Well, not in a TOO uncomfortable where you can't even focus or starve to death.

This idle time in my hand or life right know really put my will and spirit of learning to test. It's a test of self discipline now. Instead of external factors such as class time table to push me to get up and do something productive or learn something new or be a better person than yesterday. This time it's the internal push that comes in play here.

I have to push my own self now to get up early every morning and learn, acquire knowledge and articulate back those knowledge in my own words. It's hard, really hard. Having self discipline is the hardest thing for me now.

Maybe i should give myself some pep talk from time to time. Maybe it'll help me become more disciplined. But one thing for sure now. I have to articulate the stuff that I read now into my own writing. It's the only way for me to retain that knowledge and information that I gained everyday. I have to do it.

I think the other way for me to be mentally healthy is to abstain from indulging myself with information to much at a time. It's addictive and hard to stop that habits in the age where information is in bundle and can be pick so easily. Especially political stuff, yeah i know that politics is an important aspect in one life as a citizen in a county but i think it's only important for me to know some news only, yeah i should do that, that's all from me today