Spoon and Fork

  isnt it kinda sad that you're starting to hate yourself because you feel estranged in the sea of people that you recognise and know. maybe you're just so different from others that you're perceived as an anomaly?  isnt it kinda sad that the one person you're hoping to understand you, to console you, doesnt seem to understand you? maybe it's the expectation that disappoint you so much. you try to be mindful of others, yet it doesnt seem it goes the same way around, why are you being so kind to your friends and others when they dont even give a shit about you. i'm tired of this world and i hate myself. it's tough to love yourself when throughout all your life, you don't know what pure love is like, what pure love directed towards you is like. you then grasp for the air and shout for help towards the sky hoping that someone, maybe someone, can hear you and held their towards you, to help you from drowning of self hatred. but you never did received any han...

  Love is a lot of like someone uninvited that comes knocking on your door and while you opened the door, he just storms into your house, having a seat at your living room sofa. If I were to describe how love feels to me, that’s how I’ll explain it. And a certain point in life, you have to make a decision that will alter your course of life completely, for some it involves transforming their self, abandoning that cacophony that once house their old self. For others, it involves the heavy responsibility that added the weight on the back of their body. He has to choose whether to abandon that said responsibility, although not saying it out loud, at least, imprinted onto his soul and mind. Abandoning that said responsibility also comes at a cost, a cost he weighting around. He may or can abandon it but it comes with a cost, a cost that will haunt him for the rest of his life, of course we don’t know that, but hypothetically speaking, of course he’ll always remember it if that sa...

 a person who read this might infer me as a person who likes to complaint every single thing that gone wrong in his life towards the system but ah hell whatever its my personal blog so let me lament here all i want. when speaking about career, it's easy to imagine it when we are in university if you attended one but post university life, at least current one, you realise how unprepared you are in facing the so called working and career life. In a sense, it is as if, you had to narrow down your life choice at the tender age of 18-19, at after you start your university life, it's hard to turn back to. so is the education system had failed us? honestly, when i graduated i realized how broken and disparage our own education system is, if it did lauded as a success, you would think that critical thinking, careful reading and moral integrity would be ingrained so into our current society, seeing as there is so many university graduates and people who at-least had experienced tertiary...

My current reading has revealed that state, nation state or a government tend, or should I say, must have a myopic view of its subject in order to rule over them effectively and efficiently. Which isn’t a bad and such a catastrophic ordeal if you measure it through the current view of course, but it is still a paradigm nonetheless, the only paradigm that can exist in today’s modern world. It can be argued with such a mono-paradigm, type of governing, when a disaster struck, people would realize how fragile having only one type of state would do to the world. Maybe the world will fall into a state of anarchy, where law wouldn’t exist and barbarity would reign supreme. Or, would it? If you measure everything by the western rule and measurement, of course anything that falls outside of its view would be deemed as barbaric, maybe that’s why cold war happened. Beneath the veil of capitalism vs socialism, lies the true feelings of superiority of their system of governing or world view is...